Happy Birthday K

Today is K's birthday. As I was driving home I started to think about how we were going to miss another first for our son. I tried to imagine what his day was like. Did anyone one remember today was his birthday? Did anyone give him some special time on this his special day? Do they even celebrate birthdays in Ethiopia? They'll be no cake. No silly hat. No family standing around with camera's snapping away taking pictures.

As I started to slide into the poor poor pitiful me's I recognized a note of bitterness blanket my spirit. Rick and I will mourn and do mourn so many things regarding our children. I wish I was with K today. I wish I saw so many of the firsts that have already passed us by. I began to pray to be released from the bitterness. As I sat to write on the blog I realized all of this loss is a gift. All of the things we missed and mourn have given us a bit of empathy for what our boys will experience. At some point they will miss their birth family, their birth country and all the what could have beens. Their feelings and experiences won't be completely foreign to their parents.

So tonight as Rick and I place a candle on a cake I'll make a wish for K. This wish will be a prayer. The prayer will be

St. Theresa's Prayer
May today there be peace within. May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.