6-week no hold

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."

Gelatians 6:9

For us adoptive parents our "pregnancy" is filled with learning about our child's birth origin, transracial/transnational, attachment and bonding issues. One piece of advice that keeps coming up over and over again is for at least 6-weeks only Mom and Dad can hold, feed or change the children. This is difficult for a couple of reasons.

First I think of my mother. She has been a real trooper. No one has seen my transparency through this experience more than my mother (other than Rick). My feelings and emotions at times were strong and raw. Others shut down and clearly communicated they wanted no part of that side of the adoption process but my mother was right there, unflinching. I find myself thinking there has to be a special reward for that strong a dedication. The idea of denying her the ability to hold her grandchildren hurts.

The second is helping family and friends understand the reasons why. We've spent countless hours reading and studying these issues. In no way do I suspect we're experts but we do have a bit of knowledge. How do we share all that to help the people we care the most about understand we're looking out for the best interests of our children. The major misconception is young children won't remember anything nor will they grieve. I pray I have the patience to continue to try to educate and challenge this assumption with facts.

The third reason is I suspect we're going to be tired and want help when Nemo & Nema arrive. Will we be able to resist the temptation to let others care for Nemo & Nema to give us a break?

Here is one helpful web site that discusses how to help family and friends understand. Click Here